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The countdown to Christmas is officially on, bringing a barrage of activity that can leave your head spinning. From the parties to the decorating to the shopping, keeping up can seem overwhelming. It’s easier than usual to get stressed out. Many marriages will crack under the pressure because any crack, even a tiny chink in your marriage’s armor can become a serious problem and strain your relationship. Let’s look at ways to keep your marriage healthy and your holidays happy!
Create a Holiday Mindset
Before the craziness of the season gets ahold of your mind, it’s time to set some boundaries for yourself. You need to change the way you think and create positive Biblical mindsets. These mindsets will not only allow you to have a happier holiday with your spouse, but they will also help you in your marriage throughout the rest of the year.
Today we are going to discover ways to develop a positive mindset about yourself and what you expect of yourself during this time. When you focus on positive thoughts and the goodness of God, you can have the cheerful Christmas you want. Remember Philippians 4:8?
Finally, brothers, whatever things are true, whatever things are honest, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue, and if there is any praise, think on these things. Philippians 4:8
This scripture shows that God does not want you to feel bad about yourself. To begin to change that mindset, first, write a positive statement to yourself and keep it visible or easily accessible. It is so much easier to spend time with your family and friends is no sweat, when you continue going over your positivity statement in your mind.
Accept that good is good enough, and avoid the trap of perfectionism. No individual is perfect, so no holiday can be perfect.
Surely there is not a righteous man on earth who does good and never sins. Ecclesiastes 7:20
Worrying that everything is subpar does nothing. It just makes you crankier, which may lead you to criticize yourself even more. Try to laugh about the things that just don’t turn out as you expect. If you are really struggling with this, try turning off your social media for a while. Those other families aren’t perfect either and seeing their false perfection can make you feel worse.
Silence the Negative
Turn off that internal voice that tells you that you are not doing enough. Most people have an inner critic that tears them down every day. Satan loves to make us doubt ourselves, but you have a God who believes in you. So take a stand and stop that voice from overpowering the joy of the season.
Keep Jesus in the holiday by spending time with Him and he will bring you the peace you need. Read His Word and pray each day to focus your mind on what is really important.
When something begins to annoy you, don’t fly off the handle. Stay calm. Don’t snap at your spouse.
With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, Ephesians 4:2
Take a deep breath, count to ten, and if that doesn’t work, remove yourself from the situation temporarily until you calm down. Do something else for a while, and then address the problem calmly.
Remember the Reason
Focus on the reason we celebrate this season. Remember Christmas is not a time to focus on the external celebrations, but instead the internal restoration from God. Christ came to the earth for you. His birth opened up a connection between Almighty God and you. He came for your eternal salvation, and he provides everything you need for your spiritual, emotional, and physical health.
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed. 1 Peter 2:24
What your tree looks like and how delicious the cookies are has no effect on his love for you.
👁️Be on the lookout for next week’s blog to see how you can apply your new mindset specifically toward your spouse.
Does your mindset keep you back from experiencing the most you can from your marriage? Click here for information and to enroll in our “5 Days to a More Constructive Marriage Mindset” course.
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